Nashville Cats

Nashville Cats play clean as country water. Nashville Cats play wild as mountain dew. Nashville Cats been playin' since they's babies. Nashville Cats get work before they're two.

Just a wee bit of drama booking the hotel in Nashville. The internet connection had been a bit dodgy all day so of course it cut out before we got our confirmation number. We pulled over and tried it again but got the message that we were creating a duplicate reservation and if we continued we would incur a duplicate charge. Well, we don't want that.

We went on to the hotel where they could not locate our reservation. But that was because they were only checking the list that had been printed out at 8 AM. When we told them we'd just made the reservation 15 or so minutes before we arrived they had no problem locating it, even though our confirmation email didn't show up for another two hours.

It seems we always eat at the Riverfront Grille when we are in Nashville. We wanted to try a different place and Mark fancied a steak. The Palm had rave reviews so we went there. Of course once Mark saw that there was lamb on the menu he forgot all about the steak! But not me, if there is filet on the menu, that's what I'm having. It truly was One of the best steaks I have ever eaten and the brussels sprouts and creamed spinach were both exceptional! Also, probably the most expensive dinner I have ever eaten.

But the thing we didn't want to change was going to Layla's Bluegrass Inn. We've been to Tootsie's and Second Fiddle and we really prefer the bluegrass that's played in Layla's to the more traditional country music played in the other places. The music hadn't changed but the clientele sure had. To borrow a line from "Bernie" some of them had "more tatoos than teeth" not to mention multiple body-piercings. I know you shouldn't judge people based on how they look, but these people just did not look like your typical bluegrass audience. Maybe they closed Coyote Ugly??

We'll be off to Kentucky tomorrow.

Memphis!

Long distance information, give me Memphis, Tennessee...

Memphis is famous for three things:

1. Beale Street
2. Barbecue
3. Elvis

This was our third trip to Memphis. Graceland is a must see -- once. We thoroughly enjoyed our visit to Graceland several years ago, but we've never had any desire to go back. There's no need, nothing has changed there since Elvis died.

But Beale Street is a vibrant, lively place. While it is a regular city street by day, the barricades are put up in the evening and you can eat, drink, watch the street performers, or just watch people being people. Sometimes a band dominates the airwaves and sometimes it's just a cacaphony of sound.

Then there's the barbecue. What is the diference between Texas barbecue and Memphis barbecue? For starters,they barbecue pork instead of beef. Mark loves ribs. When he orders a full rack of ribs in Texas it hangs off all sides of the plate. Not so with a full rack of pork ribs. Let's face it, even that big hog they show off at the Texas State Fair every year is nowhere near the size of a cow. The other difference is that Memphis-style barbecue relies more on a dry rub than on mopping sauces. I'm really undecided about that. I think they dusted everything on the plate with the dry rub, including the potato salad - good if you like spicy (and I do), probably not that great if you don't.

But the highlight of this year's trip to Memphis has to be the marching ducks at the Peabody Hotel. We got there an hour ahead and snagged a really good table. For those who are unfamiliar with the ritual, the ducks march in every day at 11 AM and stay in the lobby until 5 PM. The Duckmaster, who has a uniform somewhere in between that of a bell captain, a ringmaster, and a beefeater, announces the schedule of events: There wil be a brief history of the Peabody Hotel and the story of how the ducks came to be there. Then the Duckmaster will bring them in. They will exit the elevator and walk across the red carpet to the fountain, where they will stay until 5 PM. The red carpet is rolled out and the stairs are set up. We all wait in anticipation until the drums roll, the elevator doors open, the marching music starts, and here come five mallards down the red carpet heading for the fountain. Now, I should mention that in addition to the Duckmaster, there were four "men in black" for security. It's really so much fun to think that all of this fuss is made over some ducks. And the souvenir shop is full. Well done Peabody! I don't see how you could possibly get any more out of that!

And now we're headed for Nashville...

On the Road Again

On the road again! I just can't wait to get on the road again...

I actually started writing this yesterdyay. I'll get around to why it didn't get posted yesterday a bit later. Anyway, we set off at 10:40 in the morning, missing our targeted departure time by 40 minutes. But that's the great thing about a road trip. It doesn't matter! It was a great day for driving. Sunny and bright, minimal number of roadworks and we arrived in Memphis before dinner.

We booked a hotel near Beale Street. That took a bit of doing. Mark pulled up a hotel booking website while I was driving. A hotel with free parking just off Beale Street for $95. And they offered to throw in breakfast for two for an additional $7. Sounds good. Book it Danno. The message said he had misentered the credit card details and to please try again. Well, not likely that he misentered it twice, just try a different card. No! Misentered again. Something must be wrong with the website. (Keep in mind that the last time Mark booked a room online he booked for a year instead of a night.) Before he got around to calling customer service, he did notice that he was on a UK-based website. European credit cards are formatted differently, which is why none of ours would go through. Easy to fix. Get on the US website and do it again. But the price was significantly higher. The next move is to call customer service and get the same price that's offered to the British. That didn't go well. Between the road noise and the customer service rep's thick Indian accent he didn't get anywhere. Put out that he couldn't get as good a deal as a Brit (especially as he is a Brit) he went to find a different booking website. But just to be sure, he went back for a second look at the UK-based site. Sure enough, the prices were listed in pounds rather than dollars. Brits are not getting a better deal. We are booked. Beale Street and barbecue are calling our names!

Oh yeah, I was going to mention why this didn't get posted yesterday. I opted to do it on the iPad rather than on the computer, for reasons that seem really dumb right now. Anyway, I was typing away on the iPad and hit the preview button when I got a message that the iPad was offline. Argh! I was out of time. We were pulling into the hotel parking garage. And as we got the bags settled into our room I was faced with a choice. Go online and sort out my blog, or head on over to Beale Street and Memphis barbecue. (Sorting the blog was never really an option.)

Don't Make Me Stop This Car!

I am struggling to get over bronchitis and prepare for our upcoming long road trip all at the same time. I should explain how I categorize road trips. There are three categories. A day trip is where you reach your destination, spend a bit of time and then return home all on the same day. A short road trip is one where you reach your destination the same day, spend one or more nights and then return home. A long road trip is one that requires an overnight stay before reaching your destination, or one that has multiple destinations. That being clarified, this is our annual long road trip. I'd like to be excited but I'm too busy coughing and sneezing. Right now, (although always subject to change) we're planning stops in Arkansas, Tennessee, West Virginia, South Carolina, and Georgia before heading back home.

I like the long road trip. Just me and my soulmate, solving all the world's problems, discussing religion and politics, out on the road with our computer and our iPad. So very different from my first long road trip experience -- a family vacation when I was probably nine or ten. Looking back, it was probably all my fault. For as long as I could remember, and no doubt before I could remember, we had gone to Grandma's house during the summer vacation. That would classify as a short road trip. We spent one week with each set of grandparents. They lived less than an hour's drive apart. And that was summer vacation. But I had reached the age where we had to write an essay on what we did over summer vacation when we returned to school. I went home from school whining that everyone else went to Washington DC, or to the beach in Florida, or to Disneyland in California, or to the Grand Canyon, wherever that was. And I never went anywhere but to Grandma's house. Woe was me. Now, if my parents had been thinking, they would have challenged me to write it so that Grandma's house seemed more exciting than it actually was. It would have helped me launch a career in marketing. But that's not what happened. The next summer, my three younger siblings and I were packed into the family's Rambler station wagon and we set off on a long road trip. I can only conclude that the purpose of this trip was to see how many states we could drive through before we stopped for the night. There were no Interstate Highways, so we all got out of the car to be photographed by each state line sign. Kentucky, Tennessee, North Carolina. I'm really not sure. It was all hilly and green and every now and again we would stop at a diner (no fast food back in those days) or a cave, or like the Griswold Family, to see the world's largest ball of twine. What does stand out in my memory is being in the car. Keep in mind that there were no seat belts to keep anyone in place and there was certainly no DVD playing our favorite cartoons.

Now every parent knows that if you have one child in the car you get:

• I'm thirsty.
• I'm hungry.
• I have to potty.
• Are we there yet?
• When will we be there?

You can multiply that for every child. AND you can add:

• He's on my side.
• She's touching me.
• He's looking at me! (My personal favorite.)

And because parents can't let these things go without addressing them:

• Yes, I can see the dust coming out of your mouth. You will have to wait until we get to a rest area.
• Can you wait until we get to a rest area?
• No, we're not there yet.
• Stay on your own side of the car.
• Stop touching your brother.
• Stop looking at your sister.
• DON'T MAKE ME STOP THIS CAR!!

Yep, that's what I remember about those family road trips from my childhood. But this will be me and my soulmate, on a serendipitous journey, with only the sounds of our own voices, maybe the radio and the sounds generated by our electronics. Can't wait!!

Tomato Cucumber and Watermelon Salad

This is one of the best salads I've ever made. I got the recipe out of a magazine and we loved it. Very refreshing for a hot summer's day. I thought I'd share it. It serves 4.

• 2 Tablespoons Extra Virgin Olive Oil
• 2 Tablespoon fresh lime juice
• 1 Teaspoon lime zest
• 1/2 cup cilantro, chopped
• 1/2 cup sliced green onions
• 1/4 cup fresh mint, chopped
• 1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 4 tomatoes on the vine, diced
• 2 English cucumbers, diced
• 3 cups diced watermelon

Whisk oil, lime juice, half the cilantro, green onions, mint, cayenne pepper and salt to make the dressing.

Combine the tomatoes, cucumbers and watermelon and the remaining cilantro in a bowl and toss with the dressing.

We like it with steak but it will go with anything you're grilling. (The dressing also makes a good marinade for meat.)

If Not Here, Where??

Every year when the temperature soars into the triple digits, Mark and I rethink where we have chosen to live. Last year we had three consecutive months of triple-digit temperatures. Thankfully, this year it was only three weeks. But still, we discussed moving. He'd like to be near the ocean. Well, who wouldn't? But oceanfront property is typically very expensive. And besides, 80 degrees with 98 percent humidity doesn't feel much better than 105 degrees with 40 percent humidity. It's all hot. This eliminates Florida and much of the east coast. Northern California comes up. Again, the housing is far too expensive, and the weather can be a bit chilly. What about the mountains? Colorado, New Mexico, Utah or maybe the hills of Arkansas, Tennessee or Kentucky? Too much winter. England even came up this year. Are you kidding me? The housing is even more expensive than California AND it rains every Tuesday. Not to mention, we were just there in June and people were wearing coats. Not lightweight jackets -- coats. (We can visit more often, but let's not move.) Perhaps we should consider someplace we've never been before. Maybe Costa Rica, Belize, or Thailand? That would require more research and probably a field trip. But before a decision is made it cools down, like it did this weekend.

It was so pleasant that we went to the Dallas Arboretum to see the Chihuly exhibit. We enjoy going to the Arboretum just to see the plants and they threw in an art exhibit at no extra charge! They even accepted our expired Groupon. We had lunch at the DeGolyer Restaurant, which is a full service restaurant and has much nicer food than the snack bars. A couple of the exhibits had sustained some minor hail damage from the last big thunderstorm, but remarkably it was minimal, almost unnoticeable. All in all, it was fantastic! Here are a few more pictures.

It struck me as we were driving home -- where could we live where we could have easy access to exhibits of this caliber? Easy access to museums, performing arts, professional sports, recreation facilities, major department stores, outlet shops, and any kind of restaurant you can think of. Of course New York, San Francisco and a number of places come to mind. But we also want reasonably priced housing and a sensible cost of living. We want to have easy access to an international airport with direct flights to Europe. We want a large garden. We want the weather to be "mostly pleasant". The possibilities narrow. I'm not sure a move would result in an improvement.

Of course, if any one has any suggestions, do let me know. I'm sure we'll be having the "where should we move to" conversation again and it will be good to have some new ideas. (You do realize you could end up with us as neighbors.)

Insomnia

The Olympics have been over for nearly a week now and I still haven't watched the events I wanted to see. We recorded all of it. But the sad fact is that if I sit down in front of a TV I will be asleep after an hour. It doesn't matter that I wanted to see what was on. It doesn't matter how interesting it was. One hour seems to be my limit for watching TV. Mark is much the same, except he seems to have an unlimited capacity for watching Holmes Inspection on HGTV.

So when I see that some of my Facebook friends have posted that they can't sleep I wonder if their TVs are on the blink. Although I've never said anything, I really think they just don't want to sleep. Anybody can stay awake sitting at the computer - even me. There is just enough interaction to keep you awake. If those people really wanted to sleep they'd turn on the TV. Hardcore insomniacs should try the History Channel - it's especially hard to stay awake when you already know how it ends.

But at the rate I'm going, I'll probably finish watching these Olympic Games about the time the next games start. Maybe. I'm not sure I finished watching the last summer games that I recorded four years ago. I'm getting sleepy just thinking about it.

Just One More Thing

One more post about WinStar and then I swear I'm finished talking about it. But I do feel compelled to mention our restaurant experience. There are some restaurants in the casino, but the premier place appeared to be The Grill, which is wedged in between the hotel and the casino. A reservation was required and they were fully booked before the show, so we made a reservation for after the show and had a snack to tide us over -- I had burn-the-roof-of-your- mouth southwestern egg rolls and Mark had overpriced ($10.99 for 8) hot wings. This was in the lobby bar/coffee shop area which really didn't offer much selection. In retrospect, we might have been better off to venture into the casino to one of the five or six restaurants there. But we didn't.

After the show, we arrived at The Grill for dinner. At check-in we'd been given cards for a free starter and a free dessert. We ordered the crab cake starter. Austin, our server was so delighted. He remarked that they were out of all starters except for the crab cakes and he was happy that he didn't have to tell us they were out of what we wanted. Well, that was short-lived. Steak was the house specialty and I was looking forward to having a filet. (For me, there is NO other cut of beef.) They were out of filet. In fact they were out of every steak except Ribeye and Porterhouse. That's OK. I'll have shrimp. They were out of shrimp. Actually, they were out of ALL seafood selections except for salmon and sea bass. (Did you guess that these two are not my favorites?)

We were talking about sharing the Porterhouse (there's more than one way to get a filet!) when Austin, let us know that there were only four of those left. Decision made. Porterhouse it is. We ordered a baked potato and mushrooms on the side. Another lucky choice because I heard Austin tell the folks at the table next to ours that they were out of broccoli and asparagus. We had creme brulee for dessert and all the food was excellent - well maybe not the mushrooms - but everything else. Our server was very helpful and personable. My only complaint is that they were out of so much. Whoever does the ordering should be able to check to see how many tickets they've sold to an event, and how many rooms the hotel has booked (sellouts on all counts) and determine how much food should be on hand.

The restaurant is the real loser here. The Porterhouse, (which we shared) was $40. If they hadn't been out of filet, I would have had that at $32 and Mark would have had the Ribeye at $28. Their loss!

It's Not Vegas

I know it's advisable to read the TripAdvisor reviews before you make the reservation. Mark and I rarely do it that way and this trip was no exception. The only difference this time was that we had no other options. The WinStar Hotel was the only option available. (The WinStar Inn was only $20 less and was completely sold out when we made our reservation. The only other option was a Best Western that is nearby, but not on the property and therefore not on our radar.)

The reviews were fairly mixed. However, most of the complaints and negative remarks came from people who were expecting it to be Vegas. Sorry, Las Vegas is unique. There's no place quite like it, not even in Nevada. Several people complained about the lack of free drinks at WinStar because they are free in Vegas. There are lots of hotels and casinos in Vegas. Think about it, if Caesar's Palace offers free drinks to players, doesn't it make sense that Bellagio would do the same? Of course it does! If another casino opened up in Thackerville, Oklahoma and offered free drinks to players, I'll bet WinStar would follow suit. (Anyone taking bets on another casino opening in Thackerville?) I read one review where the reviewer was outraged because the hotel would not comp his second night even though he'd lost $1100 his first night. It seems that the hotel and the casino do not have a common owner, so it's no wonder the hotel was not particularly interested in providing these people with a free night so they could lose their money to someone else. If you go with Vegas expectations, you'll be disappointed. It's not Vegas.

I went to the WinStar casino ten years ago with a Red Hat group. Back then it was a fraction of it's current size -- a few tables and some slot machines. No hotel, no bar, no restaurant. The only thing it had going for it was that it was closer to Dallas than Shreveport/Bossier. It struck me that you really had to want to gamble to go there, which is why I never went back until this past Sunday when we went there to see Rod Stewart.

I'm not really much of a gambler, especially not with my money. But somehow it doesn't seem much like gambling when you know that you WILL lose your money. But what I really don't like is the "pay to play" system they have in Oklahoma. You pay 50 cents for each hand of blackjack. There is no opportunity to win this back. It is just gone. If you consider that the average blackjack dealer deals 56 hands in an hour (seven players) it will cost you $28.00 per hour just to play. If there are only four players the average number of hands will go up to 91. That's $45.50 per hour just to play. You'll be lucky to win enough to offset the cost of playing. No thanks.

Because my son and his family have lived in OKC for the past six years, we regularly drive past WinStar. We have watched with somewhat morbid fascination as this monument to tacky has evolved from a smallish tent-like building to a gigantic building that incorporates numerous world landmarks into it's facade. I could not imagine anything more tacky. And I assumed that the inside would be as tacky as the outside. But it wasn't. The inside is on a par with Vegas casinos. If I'm fair, I suppose the outside is as well. Vegas does have all of those themed casinos - Venice, Paris, New York, etc. But they're all separate buildings, not one huge building that can't make up it's mind what type of architecture it wants.

Based on what I read on TripAdvisor, we were prepared to wait at check-in. But we didn't. In fact, the check-in process was much smoother than most hotels. The rooms are nicely proportioned and finished in neutral tones. Everything still looks new. The hotel is reasonably priced on a Sunday night ($149) although I believe it's higher on Friday and Saturday. Personally, I don't think it warrants a much higher price no matter what night it is. However, their pricing seems to have a great deal of elasticity. We wanted to attend an event once in the past and it coincided with the Super Bowl in Dallas and the hotel had doubled the room rate. Not nice. We decided to pass on Craig Ferguson that time. We'll try again next time he's back. But now that I know there's a 90 minute limit on the show I do have the option of driving home.

Rod!

This past Sunday we went to Thackerville, Oklahoma to see Rod Stewart. Who would have thought that Rod Stewart would be playing in Thackerville, Oklahoma? Thackerville is pretty much in the middle of nowhere. As far as I know, it's only claim to fame is the WinStar casino complex, which was built there because it is as close to Texas as you can get and still be in Oklahoma. Now, everybody knows that Texans don't gamble, except maybe betting on horses. But the argument for or against casinos in Texas is political and I don't want to talk about politics. I want to talk about the show! I thought it was a great show!

Rod Stewart has been my favorite singer for decades. I've been a fan since the first time I heard Maggie May back in 1971. Just something about him. I've got albums, tapes, and CDs - guess I'll be buying MP3 next. Love his music, both as a rocker and a crooner. I saw him at Cleveland Stadium back in the 70s and again at Reunion Arena in Dallas in the 80s. Mark was telling me about meeting him in a north London pub back in 1967 before he was famous.

At 67, he's still a high-energy performer. My sister wanted to know how he was going to manage a walker and a microphone at the same time. A silly question! He can still rock the house. (Although he did do a few "sit down" numbers.) But I dare say that finding any among us (in our 60s or older) who can still move with the speed and energy we had at 20 or 30 would be a rarity. And thank goodness he didn't go bald. That just wouldn't be right.

And let's face it, not every man can (or should) wear pink. But while we're on the subject of wardrobe, I'd like to thank Rod for wearing yellow. (Our business name is "Yellow Hat". As part of the branding effort, Mark always wears a yellow hat when he's working. When he's not working he often wears a yellow shirt, or yellow socks, or a yellow tie.) So we were ever so pleased when all three of Rod's wardrobe changes included yellow. He started the show with a yellow tie, when he changed into the pink suit he had on yellow socks, and the final change was to a yellow shirt.

It would have been impossible for him to sing songs I don't like, but he did do a number of my favorites: Sailing, Maggie May, You Wear it Well, Forever Young, Tonight's the Night. And yes, I still think he's sexy. My only complaint is that the show was only 90 minutes. But as I understand it, that rule is imposed by the casino. (I guess they want you back out on the gambling floor ASAP.)

None of the Above

I typically try to avoid political commentary and controversy, but the latest batch of ads (and stunts) from BOTH candidates has really annoyed me. What is sad is that these ads and stunts probably work. If they didn't, they wouldn't continue them. But I don't think I'll be voting this year. And here are my reasons:

1. I don't want to put my "stamp of approval" on either candidate. There have been 10 presidential elections since I've been old enough to vote. During that time I've voted for the Democratic candidate six times, twice for the Republican candidate, once for the Independent and once I felt that the available choices constituted no choice and did not vote. It seems this is another one of those times. Given my liberal leanings, I was really quite surprised when I took an online quiz to see which candidate my views were most closely aligned with and the result was Ron Paul. Unfortunately, I don't think Candidate Paul will be on the ballot in November. So for me, it's like 1988 all over again. If I vote, it might encourage them to continue their shenanigans.

2. I live in Texas. My vote doesn't really count. Texas has been a Republican stronghold since the 1970s. A Democrat has carried this state one time since 1972. It wouldn't matter if the Republicans nominated an elephant as their candidate, Texas would vote for it. So, if I choose to vote Democrat, it doesn't matter because the Republican candidate will carry the state. If I choose to vote Republican, it doesn't matter because the Republican candidate will carry the state.

3. No matter who is elected, I have to get on with it. No matter how it impacts my life, I have to deal with it. When Lyndon Johnson was president, we were at war, but we all had jobs. We got on with it. We had double-digit inflation with Richard Nixon, but we did our best and got on with it. The economy (among other things) went completely wrong under Carter, but we got on with it and survived. We prospered under Reagan because we didn't realize how the national debt was being run up. Most of us were happy that we were doing well and didn't care. We had to tighten the belt under Bush, but we still got on with it. Good times with Clinton and then George W comes along and we're dumped back into a recession. But we got on with it. Obama hasn't exactly been Mr. FixIt, although our business has improved over the past year or so. But we've been doing our best and we've survived what I hope is the worst of it. No matter who is elected, we'll still just get on with our lives and adjust to whatever demands or restrictions are put on us.

I'm not suggesting that anyone else follow my lead. Although, it might be a very powerful message if no one voted, even though I don't think the candidates or the political pundits would actually get it. Personally, I like to vote "for" a candidate rather than "against" a candidate. Choosing the "lesser of two evils" is something that should be reserved for the treatment of diseases. I'm sure there are a number of people who feel very passionately about the candidate they support. I respect that, but quite frankly, I look at all the mud-slinging and I have to ask, "Is this the best America has to offer?" Scary.

If It Fits, It Ships

I don't ship that many things and I've always preferred UPS to USPS. Nothing personal, just the USPS has some reliability issues. But to get to a UPS drop off point is now a 30-plus minute drive and the post office is just down the street - within walking distance if it isn't too hot.

I've seen the ads. If it fits it ships. Weight doesn't matter. What a great deal! I need to ship some shirts to my aunt. Mark went to the post office to get a box. We made the assumption (wrongly) that we would need the biggest box they had. He came home with it and I loaded the shirts into it. They didn't even take up half the room in the box. What a dilemma! Should we buy more shirts or get a smaller box? After we decided on the smaller box, I suggested that Mark return the big box to the post office and get the next size. He didn't think the post office would exchange the box and suggested I go handle it myself.

So I picked up the box to take it to the car. Halfway across the room all the shirts fell out the bottom. Not particularly secure as boxes go. It didn't occur to me that I might need packing tape. Every time I shipped anything with UPS, they taped the box. Why would the post office be different? But for now, it was clear that I would have to carry the box (which I couldn't tape because I wanted to exchange it) and the shirts separately. I got the shirts and the box all loaded into the car and drove the two blocks to the post office. I waited in line(as you do at the post office) and when it was my turn I explained that the box was too big and I'd like to swap it out for a smaller one. The clerk (a newbie) politely explained that they were not set up to do refunds or exchanges. Really?? Everyone does refunds and exchanges. But apparently not the USPS. Oh yeah, it's almost like the government. Of course they're not set up for refunds! (It's a wonder you can get one from the IRS!) So now I have to buy another box and take the big box back home. Maybe I can sell it in a garage sale. We paid $5.49 for it so we should be able to sell it for at least 25 cents.

Anyway, I selected the medium-sized box and started putting the shirts in it. I asked the clerk if they taped the boxes. It seems that they only tape the boxes if you are shipping priority mail. Otherwise you can buy a bit of packing tape for $3.49. As it happens, we have rolls and rolls of packing tape at home. I phoned Mark and told him he was right about not being able to return the box and could he please bring me the packing tape. (He LOVES it when I say "Darling, you were right...)

So Mark came and taped up the box. By this time, the clerk had gone on break and the Postmaster had come out to tend the counter.

"Hi Barbara, I thought I heard you. How are you?"
"I'm fine Gwen, how are you? This is just proving more work than I'd anticipated."
"Don't worry, we'll get you fixed up."

Next Gwen weighs the package to determine how much the postage is. That was when I stated my mistaken belief that "If it fits, it ships - it's a flat rate." It was also when I found out that I had the wrong box for that. I was directed to the flat rate boxes on the wall, right next to the boxes like mine. And then I looked at a poster for flat rate shipping. It showed a smiling postman delivering boxes that looked quite similar to the box I had, not those teeny things displayed on the wall.

"This poster is a bit deceptive. It shows this size box, not those small ones."
"Oh, those are priority boxes. Priority boxes are free! Do you want to send it priority?"

What! I've already bought two boxes and NOW they tell me there's a free box? And if I send it priority, they'll tape it for me. I've already taped the second box so I am now obligated to buy it.

Who knew there were so many choices at the post office? And it's easy to make the wrong choice without even realizing it.

And bless her, the Postmaster tried to give me a break. When she tallied up the tab, she said "You already had the box, right?" And honest me, said "No, I had the wrong size box so this is a new one." (My parents taught me that honesty is the best policy, and I still believe it.)

But I think that the next time I want to ship something, I just might drive 30 minutes to the UPS store.

BAH BAH RAH?

Barbara. It has three syllables. Pronounced BAR-ba-ruh, with the emphasis on the first syllable. I will accept the two syllable pronunciation BAR-bruh, (a la Streisand) emphasis on the first syllable. But there is absolutely nothing worse than being called BAH-BAH-RAH (with equal emphasis on each syllable). It's like some kind of sheep cheer. Bah Bah Black Sheep gone awry. But wait, there is something worse - it's being called "Miss" BAH-BAH-RAH. Or worse still, they add my surname and make it BAH-BAH-RAH EEL EE OTT.

It is irritating that American companies (like Hotels.com) want to ship their call center jobs offshore. Far too often I'm trying to resolve an issue with someone I can't understand. Years ago I was very tolerant of people who couldn't speak English. I thought they were immigrants who were struggling with the language and I gave them a lot of credit for making a big move and learning a new language. Then I found out that they weren't immigrants at all. They hadn't moved. They were living in Bangalore or Mumbai and taking jobs away from Americans so the corporate fat cats could make an extra buck. So these days I have very little tolerance. I'm not rude. (There really is no reason to be rude to anyone.) It is not rude to say (calmly, of course) "I'm sorry. I can't understand you." And repeat it as often as necessary.

But the next time someone asks, "May I call you BAH-BAH-RAH?" The answer will be "No, you may not. You may call me Barbara."

What's in a Name?

Nutty Acres? Did I really write that? I suppose I did, while under the influence of Mark. Usually he's a good influence, but every now and then he leads me astray. This was one of those times.

We're not nutty. Having two big pecan trees and a house on Walnut Street doesn't even begin to qualify as "nutty". Secondly, this house is on about a third of an acre. In order to qualify as "acres" there must be at least two. So no more "Nutty Acres".

Naming one's house is a very English thing to do. It seems perfectly logical to name a castle or a manor house. It seems whimsical to name a cottage. I like whimsey. I'm going to name the house.

When we were in England in June, I was on the lookout for house/cottage names. Some of the more common names are: Rose Cottage, Ivy Cottage, Orchard Cottage, Willow Cottage, Corner Cottage, Honeysuckle Cottage, Badger Cottage, and Nightingale Cottage, just to name a few. It seems that many names are taken from the local flora and fauna, or in the case of "Corner Cottage", location.

Our house definitely qualifies as a cottage. Two thousand square feet, two stories. Small and cozy by local standards. And we're on a corner - Corner Cottage? No. I don't think that two rose bushes qualifies us to use the name "Rose Cottage". We only have one holly bush and our one lavender is near death. We could have used "Ivy Cottage" until Mark ripped all the ivy off the house and killed it. Let's consider animals. We've seen an opossum skittering about the back garden. "Possum Cottage"? Probably not. I haven't seen any skunks or raccoons lately, but I don't like the sound of "Skunk Cottage" or "Raccoon Cottage". We could consider "Mockingbird Cottage" or "Hummingbird Cottage". I don't particularly like mockingbirds, but I love the hummingbirds that visit our garden and "Hummingbird Cottage" has a nice ring to it. We have a fair number of butterflies, so "Butterfly Cottage" might be an option. We also have honeysuckle, but it's in the back garden and you can't see it from the front. But you can see the huge pecan trees that tower above the house. Pecan Cottage?

So right now the options are:

1. Hummingbird Cottage
2. Butterfly Cottage
3. Pecan Cottage

You can't text or phone in your vote, but you can provide feedback. Seriously, I'm interested in anything any of you have to say about it. And I'm open to other suggestions. (Unless you're going to tell me not to name the house.)