That Escalated Quickly

My, oh my - how life has changed in just two weeks! Two weeks seems like a lifetime ago. Two weeks ago we celebrated St. Patrick's Day with a few friends - we followed the guidelines and kept our gathering to less than 10 people with no handshaking or hugging. (Social distancing wasn't a thing yet.)

The next day, we decided not to attend any more gatherings, even though very good friends had decided to have a brunch the coming Sunday. We made our decision because they were closing all the public buildings within the village and people's children and grandchildren were turning up in the community and we felt that would increase the risk of exposure to COVID 19. We continued to go for walks and rides around the community. We started ordering groceries online and switched our prescriptions to a pharmacy with a drive-thru window. We started collecting our mail with disposable gloves and letting it sit for several hours (sometimes days, depending on what it was) before opening it. All deliveries, whether from the grocery store or Amazon get wiped down and disinfected. (Except fresh vegetables - we only wash those, we don't disinfect them.)

A few days after all the indoor facilities were closed they closed the pools. I don't believe the virus survives in chlorinated water but I think they were concerned about the lounge chairs and tables and other surfaces, as well as the lack of social distancing in that environment.

Even a week later, Florida cases of the virus were still in and around Miami. I still felt safe enough to play golf the following week. They'd removed all the rakes, locked all the on-course restrooms, and raised the cups off the ground so the balls didn't drop in. No need to touch anyone else's stuff and golf is not much of a contact sport as long as you refrain from "high-fiving" people. People were being very conscious about keeping the recommended six feet apart.

We continued to go for walks and rides around the community. Until yesterday when it was reported that our community had it's first case of COVID 19 and there were 46 cases reported in the county (out of a population of 686K). Today there are 63. There are about 15K people in our community. Math was never my strong suit, but if you follow the model, each person who gets it infects 2.4 other people. It's kind of like compound interest, only faster. So we can expect the number of cases in our community to rise exponentially. Now the pickleball and tennis courts have been closed and they will probably close the golf courses soon, if they haven't already.

In light of these new developments, we've decided to follow the guidelines they're following in England and Germany, which are far more stringent than here. No more walks. We're only going outside into our semi-enclosed courtyard and onto our screened-in lanai.

We just have to remember to keep our garage door shut. Mark's workshop is visible when the garage door is open and it seems to attract men like a magnet.

Why Did He Call?

Last summer we talked with some representatives of a company that were proposing to buy our inspection company. It all sounded great - they were going to take on all of the employees, pay them more than we were paying them, provide them with insurance and other benefits and when we told them what we wanted monetarily, they didn't bat an eye.

After numerous phone calls and meetings with them we thought we were close to a deal. But when it came down to it, they weren't going to keep all the employees, plus they were going to make them contractors with no benefits. And they wanted us to take a very small amount of cash and take the rest in what I call funny money and deferred money. The funny money was stock in their company. It's funny money because the stock is not publicly traded and therefore there's no way to confirm what it's really worth. It's worth what they say it's worth. The deferred money was a monthly commission based on monthly sales but they didn't intend to maintain the marketing program, which is very effective at generating sales. Stop the marketing and the sales drop off. (We know this because there have been occasional problems getting the mailers out and there is a corresponding drop in the number of calls and orders.) If the sales dropped off, so would the monthly commission check. They also wanted us to include exclusive rights to software that we developed. We found the offer so inadequate that we didn't even feel there was anything to negotiate about so we just stopped communicating with them.

So just before we went into quarantine someone else from that company called. Were we still interested in selling? We hadn't spoken to any of them since last July. For some reason, Mark didn't just dismiss him. But Mark did tell him we had a buyer for more than twice what they had offered  - all cash - no stock. Instead of saying, "Gee, that's great. Good luck and goodbye" he said he was looking at the financials we'd provided last summer and that as near as he could tell, we weren't making any money.

My immediate thought was "if you're not buying it, why do you care? Are you seriously just phoning up to express concern over my profit and loss statement?" But I didn't say anything because I wasn't actually a part of the conversation. But then Mark asked me to clarify things for the caller. He said "It doesn't look like you're making any money." I was fairly annoyed at that stage.  "I don't know why you're saying that and I don't know what you're looking at. You do realize that the statement shows various payments to the owners that the new owners will not have to pay? Anyway, the company is profitable and we went through all of the reports last summer with your CFO and I really don't have time to go over it with you now."

And I refrained from saying "especially since it is of no concern to you anyway".

Good Bye WalMart

So while we're isolated, I thought it would be a good idea to re-organize. I've done the laundry room and the pantry. Much better now. Not only do I know what I have, I know where it is.

But my closet. Yikes! It was awful. In Texas I had my diva closet. Everything was hung up neatly and organized according to color and sleeve length. Shoes were all off the floor. Not here. I could barely get everything in and the corners are dead space. When I brought the laundry in to hang it up, I just shoved it anywhere I could find space. Forget about colors and sleeve lengths. Handbags were up so high that once I'd used them, it was too difficult to put them back and they ended up on the floor. I bought a shoe rack for the back of the door, but the shoes often fell off onto the floor, making the closet anything but a happy place. I couldn't stand it.

But I also didn't want to pay a king's ransom to California Closets or The Container Store. I can make this a DIY project. After carefully measuring the space, I went online in search of a design tool. I tried the big box stores first because I wanted to order it online and have it delivered.

I tried several of the online design tools but found that ClosetMaid's was the easiest to use. I'd accessed it through Home Depot and didn't even realize that I was on the ClosetMaid website until nothing was going in the cart. The design tool produced a shopping list and I was able to phone Home Depot to tell them what I wanted.

It was going to be perfect. These pieces would solve the problem of the dead corners and give me all kinds of space. But as I went through the list with their customer service rep, we encountered a serious problem.

"The corner unit isn't sold online. You'll have to go to the store to get it. The nearest store to you that has it is in Orlando."

Well, that's just not going to happen. I'm ordering online because I don't want to be in contact with people. Especially people I don't know. I'm not going to a Home Depot store and I'm sure not going to Orlando.

When I made that clear, the customer service rep suggested that I order the pieces that were available for online order and then go to Ebay to see if I could order the rest.

Really? What if I can't find the other pieces? Then I've got my closet mucked up for an indeterminate amount of time. That's not a likely scenario. I will order it all together from the same place, or I won't order it at all. (They clearly don't realize that they're dealing with a woman who refused to redo the dining room in her home for over 7 years because she couldn't find the right wallpaper.)

It took a day or two because some of ClosetMaids lines are exclusive to Home Depot - probably a mistake - but I did find one that was not exclusive to Home Depot that fit the bill perfectly - SpaceCreations Plus. It's direct from ClosetMaid and it's arriving today. I think it will be perfect.

The other part of the plan was plastic shoe boxes that could be stored on the top shelf of the closet - the only wire shelf we're leaving in place. Should be fine but I counted the pairs of shoes that I needed to put in those plastic boxes (the over the door rack is awful - must go!) and it came out to 44 or 46. The best price on those boxes was at WalMart. Normally I'd just drive to the store, pick them up and head home. But these are not normal times and I didn't want to go to the store. Under normal circumstances I can brave the WalMartians but not during a pandemic. I would have to order the boxes with two different color lids.When you're OCD as I am, this is disappointing but I was prepared to work around it. I could get 36 with white lids and 10 with titanium lids. Fine. Whatever. But then I got the message that some (if not all) of the items could not be delivered but would need to be picked up.

Maybe I can do that. Depends on whether I have to get out of my car and go into the store.  If they'll bring it out and put it in the car, we'll have a deal. You would think that with the COVID 19 pandemic that allowances might be made. But you don't know until you ask.

The website indicated that I could pick it up the same day. I only wanted to know if I had to get out of the car. I couldn't figure it out just looking at the website so I decided to check with customer service. The fastest option was the online chat. I waited for over 30 minutes to be connected. It didn't happen. So I tried email. That was supposed to be answered in four hours. In the meantime I figured I had nothing to lose by trying the phone number but I didn't think anyone would answer. To my surprise they did. Unfortunately, I got a call center that I suspect was in the Philippines. I don't mean to be rude, but I have yet to be helped by anyone in a Filipino call center - no matter what company they represent. She clearly didn't understand my question - which was "do I have to get out of the car and go into the store to pick up an online order that cannot be delivered?". She advised me to call back tomorrow when the website was refreshed. WHAT???? What does that have to do with it? In typical American fashion, I assumed that if you say it louder, they will understand it. Well, they don't. First she said she was "warning me" (not because I said anything rude, but because I raised my voice). I told her I didn't think she understood my question. Then she warned me again and hung up. At that precise moment, I decided I was finished with WalMart. Forever. And Always. If that is their idea of customer service they can keep it.I might have to pay twice as much to order it on Amazon, but I won't have the aggravation and frustration. I will pay extra to maintain my sanity. So I'll be waiting until April 1st to get my shoe boxes from Amazon that cost twice as much. But that's okay. I don't have to go into a store and I don't have to put up with Filipino "customer service".

By the way, I sent an email to WalMart to complain about the whole thing and never got so much as an automated response. I'm seriously done. (And when I'm done, I'm really done. I haven't set foot in Target in over a decade and I can live just fine without WalMart.)

Online Shopping

I'm trying my best to make peace with online shopping. Truly, I am. There are some things I'm just not comfortable ordering online - like shoes. Even when I try them on in a store, most of them end up blistering my feet and causing problems. How bad would that be if I didn't try them on at all? I can order some clothes - if they come in general sizes like S M L. Numbered sizes don't work well because there's just too much variation with different manufacturers. I'll order something with a numbered size if it's a maker I'm familiar with and I've been to a store to try on the size. Pants are the worst.

Returning something to a store is bad enough - returning something you bought online is far worse. I still have a credit with an outfit called Fishpond.com because the item they sent was broken and I didn't want to pay full price for something that was damaged when it arrived. Instead of paying for the return, they issued me a credit. It's been three years and I haven't found one thing on their website that I wanted to spend that $30 on. Probably won't - especially since I don't even bother to look any more. And up until now I have resisted ordering groceries online because I don't really trust Mark to pick out vegetables and I would be insane to think that a teenager working in Publix who doesn't even know the names of most vegetables is going to do a better job. But because we're isolating, I've been forced to come to terms with it. So far, so good. I've had a cucumber, avocados, roma tomatoes, jalapeno peppers, and red and white onions selected by someone else and delivered to my door. Only one of the avocados gave me pause (it certainly wasn't the avocado I would have chosen) but when I cut into it, it was fine. The beef roast looks fine, as well.

I'm not sure we'll continue the delivery after the whole COVID 19 thing is over. The jury is still out on that one. I suspect we're paying more than you'd pay if you were in the store. Publix has a deal where you pay $10 per month and you get unlimited free delivery as long as your order totals at least $35, which is pretty easy to do. On the other hand, you probably spend a little less time choosing things online than you would spend in the store and without the hassle of traffic, which is horrific around here, not to mention the costs associated with driving a car. (Although I understand gas is really cheap right now.)

We've also encountered some availability issues. Mark wanted white distilled vinegar but we can't get any. Really? I don't really understand why the world is out of toilet paper, but vinegar? We also ordered two packages of chicken but were informed we would only get one when in fact we didn't get any. Mark believes it may be coming from a different store and that's why it isn't here yet. We'll see.

Bottom line, I'm happy not to go into the store right now. Even happier not to have Mark going in since I believe his immune system is more compromised than mine. This may be the new normal.

Cancelled or Closed

So here we are in sunny Florida really getting into the groove of the "active adult" lifestyle. We're going to shows. We're joining clubs. We're hanging out with our new friends - eating, drinking, playing dominoes. .

Then we got news of the corona virus. It was in far away Seattle and on cruise ships. Nothing to worry about here! But as suggested, we'll limit our gatherings to ten people and we'll bump elbows - no more handshakes and certainly no hugging.

We felt safe. The virus was far away. Even when cases were reported in Florida they were down around Miami and Fort Lauderdale - the busiest cruise ports. Plus this is a gated community - no security guard is going to let that virus in.

Then they closed Disney, which is relatively close to us. Not because there were any confirmed cases but as a preventive measure. It made sense. They do attract international travelers, like from China and Italy. But then they cancelled the car show. Which also made sense because the car show is open to the public and there's no need to invite the general public through our gates to endanger us. But then they cancelled Monday Night Trivia. Then they closed the restaurants except for carry out. Then they cancelled the Vocal Trash music show and then the Mermaid party and the big three-day ladies golf tournament. All dances and club meetings have been cancelled. The Farmers Market and Seafood truck that came every Monday have been cancelled. All fitness classes have been cancelled. Even the pools are closed. As near as I can tell, only the golf courses and racquet courts are open.

We've been in self-imposed isolation for nearly a week now. When they started closing schools and colleges, those kids and grandkids started showing up here to spend their extended spring breaks with their parents and/or grandparents. We decided to isolate ourselves because while we're pretty sure we haven't come into contact with anyone who might have the virus, I can't be sure about others. We go out walking and I overhear snippets of conversations about visits with grandkids. I'm sorry but toddlers are germ bags and will make you sick even when there isn't a pandemic. And unfortunately, as evidenced by my Facebook feed, there are plenty of people who choose to believe the whole COVID 19 thing is nothing more than a media frenzy and a hoax perpetrated by the Chinese, the Democrats, the Left, (choose your villain).

We also know that there are a handful of confirmed cases in Osceola and Polk counties. We believe that for every confirmed and reported case there are hundreds more unreported and unconfirmed. And my best guess is that some of those people don't even know they have it. Just another reason I don't want to go shopping or be in close contact with anyone right now. We both caught colds last November and while Mark was recovered in two weeks, it took me nearly a month and three courses of antibiotics to get over it. I'm not willing to risk getting this virus. The fact that just about everything is closed or cancelled right now just makes it easier.

Scare Tactics

No, I'm not talking about COVID 19. But I've always heard you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. I think there are people who don't understand that being nice gets you further with most people than using scare tactics.

In January we decided to put our Texas house back on the market. There was one agent I phoned simply because she sent me a Christmas card. I knew very little about her but we chatted about the house and what might have gone wrong when we put it on the market last May. Then she said she'd go over and have a look and get back to me.

She got back to me alright.She sent me a terrifying email - told me the ceiling was falling down and that the house was covered in mold. I was panic stricken. I know things can go wrong in a vacant house when no one is paying attention. But we'd been there in October and it was late December - less than three months later. I sent one of our inspector's over to check it out. Bottom line, no collapsing ceilings that he could find and no evidence of any organic growth. And if terrifying me wasn't enough, she also insulted me. She said the entire house was in DIRE need of a redo - especially the kitchen. She told me it would never sell like that - not at ANY price, except to an investor who wanted to rehab it. We'd redecorated the living, dining rooms and hallway less than two years ago. The kitchen redo was about 12 years old - all the cabinets had pull out drawers and the corner cabinets all had lazy susans. The laundry room redo was less than two years old. (I couldn't believe my taste was so bad that the entire house needed to be redone. Most people who came into our home were very complimentary about it. And I believe the compliments were sincere because if you don't like it, you don't have to say anything at all.) I suspect she was trying to set my expectations extremely low.

She said my best move would be to sell it to an investor (flipper) because no one would buy it unless it was completely renovated. And this was where she could save me money by NOT putting it in the MLS, but focusing on her list of over 50 investors. I didn't ask her how she thought that limiting exposure to other agents and their clients was going to save me money because I didn't want to argue with her. So now, in addition to insulting my taste, she also insulted my intelligence. Her big point was that other agents were just tossing out unrealistic high prices to make me happy and get the listing when they knew full well they couldn't sell it at that price. (Still trying to lower my expectations.)

Long story short, we didn't list with her. I didn't appreciate that she tried to scare me into thinking something dreadful was wrong with the house. I didn't appreciate that she insulted my taste and sensibilities by trying to convince me that the house was hopelessly unappealing. And I didn't appreciate that she tried to position herself as the only person who was telling me the truth and then being so bold as to try to tell me that not listing it with MLS would save me money. (To me, that was stretching the truth way too far.)

In the end, we listed with another agent who came highly recommended by a friend and who did not think there was anything dreadfully wrong with the house, and her only suggestion was that we repair and repaint the wall in the hallway. The wall's previous amateur repair job had been covered by a bookcase when we lived in the house, so it wasn't something we'd noticed needing attention. Anyway, the house sold within three days of hitting the market and we had three offers to choose from and only one of those offers was from an investor. The other two were people looking for a home.